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"WHEN YOUR SOULMATES DIES A GUIDE TO HEALING THROUGH HEROIC MOURNING" A BOOK REVIEW

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BOOK REVIEW: -Tim Heller,LCSW, MAPT
"WHEN YOUR SOULMATE DIES a Guide to Healing through Heroic Mourning." by Alan D.Wolfelt Ph.D. Companion Press, 2016.

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When I was walking through the our local library this "new" book, "When your Soulmate Dies" by Alan Wolfert, jumped right off the shift into my hands. Having worked in Hospice for nearly 30 years, his work was very familiar. He pioneered the "Companioning" / Grief Reconciliation approach to grief and loss..If you are not familiar with Wolfelt and Companioning, it is  worth your time. Companioning fits well into Hospice Bereavement counseling/groups. Being in Hospice social worker and bereavement counselor and a Survivor of Soulmate loss (spouse), this book spoke directly to me. Kind of like when someone says, "the clergy-person was speaking directly to me in the sermon." My only regret was it wasn't available 11 years ago when lost my soulmate, my late wife. This book is written for…

My father's life and death...In the living Years

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Sometimes there is so much to say to our fathers, that never gets said. I heard this song in the late 1980s on the radio on my way to Iowa to see my parents.  It was one of the few trips I made there alone. I started catching these lyrics to The Living Years song by Mike and the Mechanics.  I pulled the car over to the side of the road, just to sit there and listen and reflect on the words and what the words meant to me and my relationship with my own father.

On this otherwise long boring trip from Cincinnati to Des Moines, I told myself I need to reach out to my father, who was 66 at the time, to open up the lines of communication.  My mother had always been the talker, my father was usually quiet and humble.  He was an intelligent man and like most men of his time kept his thoughts to himself.

In his life time, he had been through a lot- his mother died when he was 12 and thus was raised by his father and older sister. He grew up during the Great Depression and some what knew what …

Dealing with Grief by Jason Fierstein, MA/LPC

Dealing With GriefPosted onOctober 5, 2015byJason Fierstein, MA/LPC  http://phoenixmenscounseling.com/blog/2015  
The Tale of The Mustard Seeds There is a famous tale from the Buddhist text called the Dhammapada about grief that I want to share with you. The wife of a wealthy Indian man in ancient times lost her only child, and out of her desperation and sorrow, was instructed to go meet the Buddha. Many had already thought that she had lost her mind because of her grief. The Buddha told her that before he could bring the chid back to life, she would need to find white mustard seeds from a family where no one had died, and bring them to him. The grieving woman went from house to house, but couldn’t find a household that had not suffered the death of a family member. She finally realized that that there is no house that is free from dying, and she returned to the Buddha, who comforted her and preached the truth about death and dying. I like that story, because it reminds me that in deat…

Funeral/Cremation Prices- Shop Around

Its been a long time since I posted here on my blog.  I am back....

Would you buy a car, new or used, without doing your research? Of, course not, you want to be an informed consumer.  As I have noted here before, but is worth mentioning again.....funeral prices and cremation prices have escalated in many parts of the country. If you are in the need to purchase these services, and I do purposely choose the word "purchase," Shop Around, Shop Around.

With 47% of people in the US electing cremation, the prices for cremation have taken a big jump, except maybe for a few discount crematories who will provide "Direct Cremation"of the body and return of the ashes without any service / gathering for $645 - $4,000 or so.   By 2018, the U.S. cremation rate is projected to reach 50.6 percent, said Barbara Kemmis, executive director of the Cremation Association of North America (http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2015/06/01/new-cremation-trends/28329461/). The upper en…

Purchasing Your Own Casket or Urn, Becoming an Educated Consumer

I do not accept advertising on this blog, because I am not interested in financially benefiting from this work. I am providing this as information only not as a recommendation.                                                                                                                                                    
Speaking about death may be one of the last taboos. You may not even feel uncomfortable reading this blog post. Well try not to be uncomfortable. Death is a natural part of life. We are born, we live and we die.

I am sharing this information to let you know there are other options besides what your funeral director is selling.There are several Catholic religious orders of monks that make caskets and urns for sale to the public generally less than you would pay at funeral homes.

One of the monasteries is the monks at St. Meinrad Archabbey, in south central Indiana. http://www.abbeycaskets.com/. I purchased one of their caskets for a family member. One of the fune…

GUY COUNSELING STUFF

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http://www.guystuffcounseling.com/

COUNSELING FOR MEN - SOLUTIONS WHEN YOU'RE 'STUCK' It's hard to admit, but there are times when we need to reach out for help. As a guy, I know how hard that can be because I've had to do it myself. Yes, I've been 'stuck' just like you and needed counseling for men - so I want you to know you're not alone and there are solutions out there. Solutions like Guy Stuff Counseling.
As a counselor for men I've helped hundreds of guys sort through every issue you can imagine, and with great success. Counseling for men can be the ideal place to solve challenges, but going to a counselor and revealing our problems to a stranger can be intimidating and uncomfortable.
That’s how Guy Stuff Counseling and this website came about. Our goal is to provide a helpful and beneficial resource for men (and the women who love them) to access professional expertise and advice in a convenient, non-threatening manner. On thi…

Shop around for funeral prices.

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http://blog.seattlepi.com/boomerconsumer/2014/03/11/funeral-arrangements-get-price-lists-before-making-decisions/


Boomer Consumer The Boomer Consumer is dedicated to helping boomers get what they want in life through using consumer information, making effective choices, and sharing their own experiences. Funeral arrangements: Get price lists before making decisionsPosted on March 11, 2014 | By


Many consumers will find that, like me, they’ll end up in a funeral home making funeral arrangements.
One of my first big consumer articles in my early day as a consumer journalist was writing about funeral costs.
The Federal Trade Commission was considering adopting a Funeral Rule, so I went to the funeral homes in Spokane, Wash., where I lived at the time, to see what practices consumers were experiencing. All the funeral directors interviewed said they were offering information on prices to consumers and weren’t pressuring them about adding services. I didn’t …